I used to think meditation was for people who had their lives together. You know, the ones who wake up at 5 AM, drink green smoothies, and never yell at their kids about putting shoes on.
That wasn’t me. I was the guy stress-eating granola bars while answering emails and wondering why I felt like garbage by noon.
But after one too many afternoons where I snapped at Sophie for something completely normal (like being a kid), I figured I needed to try something different.
Here’s what I learned: meditation isn’t about emptying your mind
It’s about training your brain to be less reactive. Kind of like how lifting weights trains your muscles to be stronger, except this helps you not lose your mind when someone leaves wet towels on the floor for the third time today.
The research is pretty convincing. A 2008 University of Kentucky study found that transcendental meditation lowered blood pressure by about 4.7 points systolic and 3.2 points diastolic. Another study from 2014 showed that meditation actually improved blood flow to the brain.
And here’s one that hit home: a 2018 study at Michigan Tech found that just 60 minutes after meditating, people had lower heart rates and less anxiety. Even a week later, they still felt calmer than before they started.
The benefits include:
- Slower respiration rate
- Lower blood cortisol levels
- More feelings of well-being
- Less stress
- Better sleep
Four types of meditation that don’t require robes
Concentration Meditation Pick one thing to focus on. Your breath, a word, even counting. When your mind wanders (and it will), just notice and come back to your focus point. Start with 3-5 minutes. I do this during my morning coffee before the kids wake up.
Mindfulness Meditation Sit comfortably, close your eyes, and just watch your breath. When thoughts pop up (Did I pay the electric bill? Why is the dishwasher making that noise?), don’t fight them. Just notice them and go back to breathing. It’s like watching clouds pass by.
Transcendental Meditation You repeat a specific mantra or sound. The goal is to kind of zone out into deep relaxation. This one usually requires a teacher, but the idea is simple: repeat, relax, repeat.
Yoga Meditation This happens during the final relaxation pose in yoga (Shavasana). You lie on your back, close your eyes, and just breathe deeply while staying aware. Sometimes there’s guided imagery involved.
Breathwork: meditation’s caffeinated cousin
While meditation usually involves just observing your natural breath, breathwork means intentionally changing how you breathe. It’s like giving your nervous system a manual override.
Bellows Breath (Bhastrika) This one wakes you up. Breathe in and out forcefully and quickly through your nose. It increases oxygen and sharpens your mind. Don’t do this before bed unless you want to stare at the ceiling for hours.
Belly Breathing Put one hand on your chest, one on your belly. Breathe so only the belly hand moves. This activates your “rest and digest” nervous system instead of your “fight or flight” mode. Perfect for when you feel like you’re about to lose it.
4-7-8 Breathing Breathe in for 4 counts, hold for 7, exhale for 8. The long exhale tells your body to chill out. I use this when I’m lying in bed thinking about everything I forgot to do that day.
Alternate Nostril Breathing Use your thumb to close one nostril, breathe in through the other, then switch. It sounds weird, but it actually balances your nervous system. I do this in my car before going into stressful meetings.
The real talk about getting started
You might feel dizzy, tingly, or lightheaded at first. That’s normal. If it gets uncomfortable, just breathe normally until it passes.
Start small. Five minutes is fine. Three minutes is fine. Thirty seconds is better than nothing.
You don’t need a special cushion, app, or outfit. You just need to show up consistently, even when (especially when) you don’t feel like it.
I’m not trying to become enlightened here. I just want to be less of a stressed-out parent and more present for my family. Turns out, that’s exactly what meditation helps with.
— Derek
To your health!
Derek Opperman
Chief Wellness Officer at LifeUP
“I help parents reclaim their energy — not just physically, but emotionally too. Because when you feel better, everything in your life lights up: your parenting, your patience, your purpose. My approach is about small changes that ripple out into big transformation.”
